I just read through the last two posts about Ilija's "incident" and I was taken right back to all of the emotions. And I am just sitting here crying!

Life has gotten back to normal and I am kind of really sad about it! We are back to being stressed, and worrying about the floors needing to be mopped, and squabbling about uselessness, and going to the grocery store! It has only been a month, and everything is totally back to normal. I don't like it one bit!

Ilija and I both had such a clear picture of what was important immediately after this dying thing.

We didn't spend nearly as much time with media - and never when another person was in the room. We wanted to be with that person!

We didn't stress about not getting to the to-do list, because it will be there tomorrow still!

We didn't fight over ANYTHING because none of it matters as much as having someone else right there with you.

We didn't rush, or freak out, or obsess.

Life slowed WAY down, and we were all just people enjoying each other.

I REALLY MISS THAT!

How can we keep that in our life? Even though we still want to accomplish goals in our life, and bills still do need to be paid at some point, and we need to be good stewards of our things, and our children still need to be fed, cleaned and clothed, nurtured, taught and disciplined.

How can we do all those things while also holding on to the feelings of serenity, peace and love?

How can we be productive without being stressed about being productive? It seems like we are either blissfully in the moment and enjoying life, or we are stress-fully productive. Does it have to be either/or?

Do you have any ideas?